My friend Tracey turned 30 recently. She’d asked me to write her a letter for her 30th birthday, which I did, read that here. After I sent that, I sent this little P.S which Tracy has asked that I share as well. Enjoy!
AS YOU TURN 30
Oh! And another thing dear Tracy, some things that’ll be great to clear up with yourself before marriage are:
What values do you stand for?
What are you worth?
What kind of man do you want?
What kind of man do you not want? Character please, not looks.
Pastor Paul Adefarasin always says “you can dress up ugly. You can’t dress up stupid” (or unkind, or inconsiderate…), they also say “if you marry the son of the devil, don’t be surprised when your father-in-law comes to live with you”. LOL!
My gorgeous younger sister Aisha, is 30+ and single. I tell you! She is thriving in her season and preparing for the next one by building herself up to be a powerful all round person, I love how her life is full, how it’s her own, how she embraces the freedom to travel to be unscheduled… You can read her perspective on being single in your 30’s here.
Plus she is now your sister (we have adopted you) so please feel free to inbox her on FB and talk. If you think I’m good, she is a million times better.
There are also 2 videos I believe will minister to you on the issue of choosing who you agree to spend your life with, because that decision is extremely important, next to the decision of whether to give your life to Christ or not, the decision of who you’ll get married to is your most important life decision. It will determine how far you can go, whether it’ll all be a struggle, whether you will live out every potential, whether there will be a great vision to submit to, the quality of life you will live (and by that I don’t mean materially)… The videos are ‘I will wait’ and the sequel to it by Janette McGhee. Enjoy the lyrics and watch the video below;
I WILL WAIT (by Janette McGhee)
So it seemed, that it was cool for everyone to be in a relationship but me.
So I took matters into my own hands and…ended up with him.
Him, who displayed the characteristics of a cheater, a liar, an abuser and a thief.
So why was I surprised when he broke into my heart?
I called 911, but I was cardiac-arrested for aiding and abetting, ’cause it was me who let him in, claiming we were “just friends.”
It was already decided for me by the first date that even if he wasn’t, I was gonna make him “The One.”
You know…I was tired of being alone, and I simply made up in my mind, that it was about that time, so I decided to drag him along for the ride, ’cause I was always the bridesmaid and never the bride.
A virgin in the physical, but mentally just a grown woman on the corner in heat, who was tired of the wait,
He had a…form of godliness, but not much. But hey, hey, I can change him, so I’ll take him, I mean he’s close…enough.
Ready to sell my aorta for a quarter, not knowing the value of its use to me. Arteries so clogged with my will, it blocked His will from flowing through me.
So, I thank Christ that His blood pressure gave this heart an attack, that flatlined my obscured vision, put me flat on my back.
Through my ignorance, He saw, so through my sternum He sawed and cracked open my chest to transplant Psalms 51:10, a new heart and a renewed right spirit within.
So now, I fully understand, better yet, I thoroughly comprehend, how much I need to wait for You.
See, the bad thing is that I knew he wasn’t you from the beginning ’cause in the beginning was the Word And he didn’t even sound or shine like Your Son.
Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks, and all he could whisper was sweet,empty nothing’s—which meant nothing!
He couldn’t even have prayed when I needed him to, asking him to fast would be absurd, so, forget about being cleansed and washed with water through the Word.
But I know you, you are already praying for me. Even never having met me, let me assure you, I will wait for you.
I will no longer date, socialize or communicate with carbon copies of you to appease my boredom or to quench my thirsty desire I have for attention and short-lived compliments from “sorta kindas.”
You know, he’s “sorta kinda” right, but “sorta kinda” wrong?
His first name: Luke, his last name: Warm.
Aye, I won’t settle for false companionship. I won’t lay in the embrace of his arms, attempting to find some closeness, but never feeling so far, far apart ’cause, I just wanna be held.
‘Cause all I gotta do is say, “No!”
No more “almost sessions” of “almost coming close” passing winks and buying drinks, and I’m a,I’m a,I’m a flirt!
Who flirts with the ideology of “Can you just tell me how much I can get away with & still be saved?”
I’ll stay in my bed, alone, and write poems, about how I will wait for You.
He won’t even come close, our fingers won’t even interlock, we won’t even exchange breath, ’cause I have thoughts that I’ve “saved as” in a file that God has only equipped you to open.
I will no longer get weighted down, from so-called friends and family talks, about the concern for my biological clock, when I serve the Author of Time. Who is not subject to time, but I’m subject to Him.
He has the ability to stop, fast-forward, pause, or rewind at any given time.
So, if we could role-play, you would be Abraham and I would be Sara, or you can be Isaac and I can be Rebecca—a servant’s answered prayer.
I am bone of your bone, flesh of your flesh, made up of your rib, Adam.
And once we meet, like electrons, I will be bound to your nucleus, completely indivisible atom.
We even speak the same math: 1 + 1 + 1 = 3, which really equals 1 if you add Him.
We were all created in His image, but you have the ability to reflect, project and even detect the Son.
If I were to explain what you look like, you would have to look like a star–a sun of the Son.
I would gain energy simply from the light that you shine on me. I would need you in order to complete my photosynthesis.
I await your revelation, but once again from the genesis, I will wait for you.
And I will know you, because when you speak, I will be reminded of Solomon’s wisdom
Your ability to lead will remind me of Moses
Your faith will remind me of Abraham, Your confidence in God’s Word will remind me of Daniel
Your inspiration will remind me of Paul
Your heart for God will remind me of David
Your attention to detail will remind me of Noah,
Your integrity will remind me of Joseph,
And your ability to abandon your own will, will remind me of the disciples, but your ability to love selflessly and unconditionally will remind me of Christ.
But I won’t need to identify you by any special Matthews or any special marks, ’cause His Word will be tattooed all over your heart.
And you will know me, and you will find me, where the boldness of Esther meets the warm closeness of Ruth, where the hospitality of Lydia is aligned with the submission of Mary, which is engulfed in the tears of a praying Hanna.
I will be the one, drenched in Proverbs 31, waiting for you.
But to my Father, my Father who has known me before I was birthed into this earth, only if You should see fit. I desire Your will above mine. So even if you call me to a life of singleness, my heart is content with You—the One who was sent.
You are the greatest love story ever told, the greatest love ever known. You are forever my judge and I’m forever Your witness, and I pray that I’m always found on a mission about my Father’s business.
I will always be Yours, and I will always wait for You, Lord.
More than the watchmen wait for the morning, more than the watchmen wait for the morning,
I will wait!
Have a blast my dear friend! The world and its fullness are yours to enjoy! Remember to be kind to yourself, to honour yourself and to deliberately create the life you want to live! You cannot give what you don’t have, so it is in first giving these to yourself, that you are able to give it to the world.
Enjoy your day.